Is this correct Latin?

This board is a composition workshop, like a writers' workshop: post your work with questions about style or vocabulary, comment on other people's work, post composition challenges on some topic or form, or just dazzle us with your inventive use of galliambics.
Post Reply
VABritto
Textkit Neophyte
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed May 13, 2020 12:46 pm

Is this correct Latin?

Post by VABritto »

Hey there, I have a habit of writing a journal in Latin to practice Latin daily. I was wondering if anyone could read it and tell me if it is correct. Here I am mostly interested in grammatical errors. I can imagine everyone would have a different idea of how to portray modern concepts in Latin, but since I am new to the language I would ask if it is alright with you that you judge mostly my grammar so that I know if the Latin is intelligible. I thank you very much for the help!
A.d. XVI Kal. Iun., Dominica V Post Pascha, Litore Magno.

Hodie laboravi penso Gustavi et missam Pr. Iosephi Henrici do Carmo vidimus et paeterea ego et Beatrix glos et Daniel et Petrus ludum personarum lusimus. Petrus clericus cuidam dei, Acolam appellatum, appellatus Vesley erat. Beatrix barda appellata Cassandra erat. Daniel magister ludi erat. Ego magus appellator Maximus Fahrenheit erat. Personae nostrae contra nigromantem regem in expeditionem it. Persona mea pecuniam duci debet scelesto ac insidiati sumus a viris eius qui paene nos interfecerunt. Sessio ludi nobiscum interficientibus eos finivi.

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5102
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: Is this correct Latin?

Post by bedwere »

This is not meant to be exhaustive.

Pascham

praetereā

cuiusdam

Acolae appellātī

appellātōr ?? appellātus?

insidior is deponent --> virī ejus nōbīs īnsidiātī sunt

The last sentence does not make sense to me. Maybe you meant we died and the game ended?

VABritto
Textkit Neophyte
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed May 13, 2020 12:46 pm

Re: Is this correct Latin?

Post by VABritto »

First of all thanks for the quick answer! I'll try to explain the parts that seem confusing.

"... appellatus Vesley erat"
I am trying to say that the name Peter's character, who is a cleric, is Wesley. As in "Petrus clericus ... appellatus Vesley erat". I don't know if I wrote it wrong or if the distance between Petrus and appellatus just made it rather confusing, especially because in the middle of it I name the god he is following in the game lol.

I have a lot of problems understanding deponent verbs, I need to study them up, thank you!

In the last sentence what I was trying to say was "The game session ended with us killings (in the sense of adverbializing the ending with the cum-ablative form) them. How would I say that?

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5102
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: Is this correct Latin?

Post by bedwere »

There are many ways to express something in Latin. In the present case, you could say "nōmen sibi sūmpsit Vesley", to avoid confusion.

As for the second question. you could use the ablative absolute:

Nōbīs interfectīs, lūdus fīnītus est

Or cum + pluperfect subjunctive. But definitely not nōbīscum.

You may benefit from some composition exercises:

Latin Prose Composition, North and Hillard
Latin Prose Composition Key, North and Hillard

VABritto
Textkit Neophyte
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed May 13, 2020 12:46 pm

Re: Is this correct Latin?

Post by VABritto »

Thank you very much! I made the edits and will read the book and answer keys you provided!

VABritto
Textkit Neophyte
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed May 13, 2020 12:46 pm

Re: Is this correct Latin?

Post by VABritto »

I have been reading the book whenever I had free time, which today was only late at night, but I am very happy with it! This is exactly what I needed, down to the t. It is just perfect. I never thought there was a book that actually worked towards breaking down rules of natural prose part from part! This is just genius.

I am a native English and Portuguese speaker, and I am very acutely aware that if I translated word for word my Portuguese phrases into English, it would look like a horrible monstrosity and vice versa. So I was always worried of how to actually speak Latin in a naturalistic manner. I really take an Erasmian approach to Latin so I tend towards a middle ground between solid Classical style but not hesitating one bit in picking vocabularies from the vast more than 2 millennia of growing Latin vocabulary if I end up with an expression not easily translatable in Ciceronian Latin. But like I said I'm not insane and know that my Latin needs to be firmly classical in form so that it is easily understood by those who know Latin and sounds naturalistic. This book will give me what I need to be able to do so. Once again thank you very much, you gave me a huge present!

User avatar
bedwere
Global Moderator
Posts: 5102
Joined: Fri Mar 07, 2008 10:23 pm
Location: Didacopoli in California
Contact:

Re: Is this correct Latin?

Post by bedwere »

You're very welcome. Latin is a life-time learning experience.

Post Reply